How to Find True Love

heart-1137259_1920If you want to find true love, I mean soul-shaking love, I have a secret for you:

You already have it.

What?  Yes.  It’s inside yourself.  If you want true love you first have to love yourself.  You have to love yourself so much that it doesn’t matter if someone else comes along because you have already filled your body up with your own love.  Only then may you find love with a partner.

I learned this reading the book “The Mastery of Love” (I highly recommend everyone read it).  Sure it says some silly things like “love your partner like you love your dog” but it also says some groundbreaking things about love.

They talk about a magical kitchen.  And in that kitchen you can cook whatever you like at any time.  Then imagine a woman (or man) comes to the door with a pizza and says, “You can have this pizza but in return you have to do everything I say.”  Well you would refuse stating, “I don’t want your pizza.  I don’t need your pizza.  I have my own pizza and everything I could ever want right here in my kitchen.”  But imagine the opposite:  you are starving and the person shows up with a pizza.  You would take the pizza and do as they say just to avoid being so hungry.  Then you would take another pizza when you got hungry again and before long the other person would control you.

Now imagine that is love.

We have our own magical kitchens.  First, we have to fill ourselves up with love.  We have to overflow our body and soul with self-love so that no one else can control us or abuse us.

So what are you going to do today to love yourself?


Doing What Matters: Part 6

In case you missed out on this series, you can start from the beginning here.

Ignoring what matters and avoiding the circle of doom.  Set realistic targets.  Never chase unrealistic sustainable growth targets.  Control costs and maintain them at the appropriate level – ZOG.  Invest in the marketing of your brand and make sure you maintain the level.


The future and right road map matters.  Articulate your strategy clearly and precisely.  Let people know what they shouldn’t do and provide clear direction on where the business should and should not go.  Securing an advantage must drive all issues.  Focusing on innovation isn’t enough, you need continuing improvement.

Thinking for the long-term matters.  Most people aren’t committed to long-term and set short-term goals.  Many shoot for the quick goal to achieve a boost in their career.  Long-term is thinking about your business’ future.  Speaking with my friends over at Tucson Pest Control, cost reductions must be part of your way of thinking through a business career.  He says to engage your business you must utilize innovation.  Plan incremental innovations.  Celebrate success.  And I agree completely.

Doing the right thing matters.  The role of politicians needs our help.  Be guarded and prepared dealing with the media or a politician.  Agree in advance on subject matters.  The media is professional and they know what questions to ask.  Beware of quoting any commitments.  Less is more.  Be guarded but honest with the media.  Realize there’s no such thing as an off-the-record comment with the media.

Learning matters and reflecting on a career being continuously dissatisfied.  Loyalty and long tested relationships really matter.  Personal moments matter throughout a lifetime.  The secret to success is doing something you enjoy.  Making the tough decision to terminate someone is difficult but do it immediately.  Terminations should not be judgmental but an attempt to help that person find something they enjoy doing.  Winners do the necessary homework to meet or beat a goal.  Constructive discomfort with yourself, your business or your product will fuel ongoing change and progress.  But never allow your dissatisfaction to become negative or dysfunctional.

So what does matter – growth, relationships, loyalty, small moments, timely decisions, doing what you enjoy (and find someone who will pay you to do it), life’s early lessons you learned from your parents growing up, the right team surrounded with the right people, and confronting reality when change is needed.

That’s the end of this inspiring book series Doing What Matters.  So go focus on what matters and let me know if you have any questions or comments!



Doing What Matters: Enthusiasm (Part 5)

youth-570881_1920Enthusiasm matters.  Everyone in business wants enthusiastic leaders which can drive change.  A leader is someone who is remote.  A true leader must break through that role and show confidence and be visible and show the business must grow and change.  The leader must show what needs to be done to make the business successful.  Enthusiasm is the force of personality and ideas that infuse an organization with a sense of purpose and mission.  Enthusiasm is big and has many meanings.  It must also be sustained over time and be there every day in an organization.  It should be involved in everything a leader does.

Remove unnecessary costs.  Use those funds to increase marketing and sales.  To be successful, cost cutting must be a way of life.  People must know they have all the tools necessary for change.  ZOG means zero overhead growth.  Enthusiasm on a grand scale makes all the difference.  Many CEO’s don’t show enthusiasm.  Spend time on thinking about what should be said and how to say it with enthusiasm and conviction.  It does matter and is relevant to companies and personal conversations.  Talk often and do it consistently.  Communicate a sense of urgency and need for action.  Make your expectations and accountability clear.  Fear and apprehension cripples creativity.

Action matters.  Show forward movement.  Being a doer takes dedication and you have to find a way to get things done and come up with solutions.  You must act to get things done.  Taking action can mean taking risks.  Take risks to invest in building brand equity.  The price of action is neither easy nor cheap.  But taking action typically pays off.  The time for action is now.

Understanding the right things matters.  The great leaders get it right more often than not and know how to clarify it for their people.  For a product to be successful, you must understand the overall market, the products you compete against, how the consumer views your brand and the value they attach to it.  Ignoring it is often the rule with many companies.  A few simple changes can help along the way.  Regardless of the field, adopt a vision of what and how you want to do it.  Don’t get caught up in the fad theory of the day.  Avoid a one-size fits all approach to problem solving.  Study each situation carefully and make sure each solution custom fits the problem.  Remember just because something worked in the past doesn’t mean it will work again.

Have questions?  Contact me here.



Doing What Matters Part 3: Fundamentals

If you haven’t read Part 1 or Part 2 of this book review series you can do so here.


Focusing on fundamentals matters.  Despite obesity, Americans aren’t really eating more, they are exercising less and expending fewer calories than in the past.  When you try to do too much you accomplish nothing.  Many business leaders experience trying to accommodate everyone even if it is not in the best interests of the business.  Business people and especially CEO’s want to be the best.  Realizing the importance of consistent measured growth is one example of fundamental analysis.  Forecast only what matters and focus on the fundamentals.  Fundamentals won’t come to life and be relevant unless they truly drive results.  Identify where you can get the most bang for your buck.  Avoid rollercoaster growth or it could hurt your business.

Intellectual integrity matters and it is the ability to hold a mirror in your organization.  Intellectual integrity can go from clear and objective to tarnished and biased.  The first 100 days are the most important time in a new assignment.  A strong and certain start is important.  But what matters is gaining a good understanding of what lies ahead – problems, opportunities and possible obstacles before stepping in.  Turning around a business enhances your business reputation and the type of experience needed to move to the top.  Focus on reality by viewing it from the outside.

Meeting Warren Buffett for the first time.  Buffett was on the Gillette committee and owned more than ten percent of Gillette stock.  Three weeks after the interview, Buffett announced Kilts would be the new CEO.  Gillette offered powerful brands with crippling profits.  Innovation is important when it drives sales and profits.  Kilts would focus on improving areas and assured them results would follow.  After five years, those focused areas were driving the company when they merged with Procter & Gamble.  Refusal to accept reality happens all the time and the reasons for denial varies.  Confront market reality.  It’s easy to lose the view of reality, but do your homework before taking on a new assignment.  Intellectual integrity is more than looking inward and applying personal values to making business decisions.  Just doing the right thing isn’t always enough and you must go outside yourself and the business to do so.

Stay tuned for more on this book.